coolskeleton_95 | Video/Action for Violet City

Current Mood: energetic

Video/Action for Violet City

[Papyrus can be seen training his new Lapras' swimming speed today.]

EXCELLENT! JUST 30 MORE LAPS TO GO, ARIAL! THEN IT WILL BE TIME FOR DINNER! [He's happy to encourage her, as she renews her swimming with the promise of dinner. Both Herculanum and Luminari are riding on her back for extra weight training. Papyrus himself is on the shore, supported by a pair of crutches. With Arial set to her task, he limps back to his nearby camp and sits down. Its then that he picks up the gear to address the network.]

GREETINGS, HUMANS! DESPITE SOME....SETBACKS... [A glance to the crutches.] TRAINING IS GOING SMOOTHLY! WHY, I SUSPECT WITHIN THE NEXT TWO WEEKS WE WILL FINALLY BE AT AN APPROPRIATE LV TO DEFEAT THIS FIRST GYM IN THE GYM CHALLENGE!

SPEAKING OF! I'VE READ THAT MANY GYMS EMPLOY PUZZLES THAT ONE MUST SOLVE IN ORDER TO BATTLE THE GYM LEADER! WITH MUCH EXCITEMENT I DECIDED TO INSPECT THE PUZZLE AT THE VIOLET CITY GYM...ONLY TO FIND THAT THEY DO NOT HAVE ONE! THERE IS ONLY A MECHANICAL PLATFORM THAT RAISES ONE TO AN "S" SHAPED WALKWAY!

THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE! EVEN MORE SO, WHEN I VOICED MY DISSATISFACTION TO MR. FALKNER, HE MERELY SCOFFED AT ME, CLAIMING HE HAD "BETTER THINGS TO DO" THAN FILL HIS GYM WITH "SILLY" PUZZLES! THE NERVE! PUZZLES ARE NEVER SILLY! UNLESS THEY ARE CROSSWORDS, BUT THIS ISN'T ABOUT THAT! WHY, WHAT'S THE HARM OF HAVING "X" PANELS ONE MUST TURN INTO "O"S BEFORE THEY PULL A SWITCH AND ARE ABLE TO PROGRESS? WHAT ABOUT SLIPPERY SLIDEY ICY FLOOR PUZZLES? OR, IF ONE INSISTS ON STICKING TO A THEME RESPECTIVE OF THEIR GYM TYPE, WHY NOT HAVE GAPS THAT BIRDS WILL CARRY YOU OVER? OR EVEN CANONS YOU SHOOT YOURSELF OUT OF TO REACH HIGHER AND HIGHER PLATFORMS? THE POSSIBILITIES ARE QUITE ENDLESS!

HUMANS, SURELY YOU AGREE, YES? AFTER ALL, WHAT KIND OF CHALLENGE DOESN'T EVEN INCLUDE A SINGLE PUZZLE? WHY, IT'S DOWNRIGHT CRIMINAL, IF YOU ASK ME! AND YOU ALL SHOULD! I AM, AFTER ALL, THE GREATEST AUTHORITY ON PUZZLES IN ALL OF THE UNDERGROUND! JAPES AS WELL, IF YOU PREFER THOSE!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Why is she doing this to herself again?]

The other gyms have puzzles. Falkner just has no imagination.

IT'S ABSOLUTELY CRIMINAL! WHY, IF HE INSISTS ON RUNNING A GYM, HE SHOULD REALIZE IT ALSO COMES WITH THE RESPONSIBILITY OF INSTALLING PUZZLES!

.... Right. I think he's more worried about the aerial shows he runs instead of a puzzle in a gym. The guy likes showing off those birds of his.

[Seriously. Go to one of those shows, Papyrus.]

WHA-?

THAT IS NO WAY TO SHOWCASE ANYTHING! EVERYONE'S NECKS WILL GET SORE FROM HAVING TO LOOK UP ALL THE TIME!

You... haven't been to one of those shows, have you.

[Just going to keep judging you.]

NO, AND I DON'T INTEND TO INDULGE SUCH A FRIVOLOUS FRITTERING OF FLIGHT!

Suit yourself. It's not like you're missing out. It's not that great. Just like his lack of puzzles.

I WOULD BOYCOTT HIM ENTIRELY! BUT I NEED THE BADGE TO COMPLETE THE GYM CHALLENGE! I'LL SIMPLY HAVE TO INSPIRE HIM TO DO BETTER WITH MY AMAZING BATTLE PROWESS!

[Patience, Lightning, patience.]

So you're going to monologue.

ONLY A LITTLE! AFTER ALL, WORDS ONLY DO SO MUCH!

If you piss him off, I'm sure we'll all hear about it sooner or later.

NONSENSE! I'M POSITIVE HE'LL SEE THE ERROR OF HIS WAYS!

[Such delusional thoughts...]

Right. Good luck with that.

THANK YOU, SHYREN LIKE HUMAN!

My name is Lightning.

[...You probably shouldn't have said that.] REALLY? IS THAT REALLY TRUE!?

I wouldn't have said it if it wasn't. [Will she regret this?]

THAT SOUNDS LIKE THE NAME OF A GREAT WARRIOR!

[Oh boy...] That's because I am one.

THEN, YOU MUST HAVE STORIES ABOUT FANTASTIC BATTLES YES?

I don't like to brag.

OH, PLEASE DO!

Maybe some other time.

AWWWW.....

[Time to exit out of this conversation before he tries to goad her into talking.]

Don't do anything stupid. Got it?

NYEH HEH HEH! THE GREAT PAPYRUS NEVER DOES ANYTHING ONE MIGHT CONSIDER STUPID!

[Riiiiiiight. She's... just gonna go now. Don't die. Or at least not where she can see it.]

[Hey, so long as there aren't any ambiguous knife wielding children around...]

Well, it looks like we're all discovering the hard way that humans are surprisingly breakable, aren't we.

[Not that it's obvious from looking at him; Mettaton looks to be back in his room in Goldenrod, doing nothing in particular outside of just kind of lounging on the bed, though he's been pretty scarce on the network lately and that's been entirely for a reason.]

Though that probably explains the lack of cannons, darling. There's nothing humans could really do with those other than die a lot.

UGH, IT'S SO TRUE! SPENDING HOURS SQUISHED UNDER A NEWLY HATCHED LAPRAS HAS SO MANY REPERCUSSIONS! HOW FRISK SURVIVED ANY OF OUR COMBAT MAGIC WAS CLEARLY SOME SORT OF MIRACLE! I'LL HAVE TO OUTFIT THEM WITH PROTECTIVE GEAR THE NEXT TIME I SEE THEM!

BUT, THIS ONE TIME, UNDYNE AND I FOUND THIS POSTER AT THE GARBAGE DUMP AND IT HAD HUMANS BEING SHOT OUT OF CANNONS ON IT! IT SAID "COME SEE THE AMAZING HUMAN CANNON BALL THE GREAT BOOM-INI!" SURELY THE RIGHT KIND OF CANNON WOULDN'T HARM THEM?

[What the hell is a frisk- ...Right, right, that person he was bent on murdering last time he saw them probably has a name, don't they.

(...In his defense, it's not like anyone thought to ask and everybody pretty much spent the human's entire time in the Underground basically calling them HEY YOU or some variant thereof, but still.)

Anyway.]

I think the concern is more with the landing, isn't it...?

[To be fair, Paps really only learned their name through....extraordinary means himself. If it weren't for a certain boss monster, he'd probably still be calling them "human".]

NOTHING A FEW HUNDRED SUPER FLUFFY PILLOWS CAN'T HANDLE! OR A POOL! OF GELATIN!

[Blake is giving him a dubious look.]

You're telling me you want these gyms to be more of a pain in the ass?

WHAT'S THE POINT OF A GYM "CHALLENGE" IF THERE'S NO CHALLENGE TO IT?

The challenge is supposed to be your monster beating up their monster, not you playing Tic-Tac-Toe.

Nobody makes you do one of those damn number-box things before you arm wrestle.

THERE IS MORE TO LIFE THAN SIMPLY DOING VIOLENCES! I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT MY X TO O PUZZLES ARE EXTREMELY CHALLENGING AND INSPIRING!

Christ, you really do make people play Tic-Tac-Toe?

MY X TO O PUZZLES ARE MUCH MORE COMPLEX THAN A SIMPLE CHILDREN'S GAME!

Turning Xs into Os can't be that complicated. You just make them rounder.

OH, BUT THAT'S WHAT THEY WANT YOU TO THINK! PERHAPS I SHOULD CONSTRUCT A PUZZLE FOR YOU, EH, HUMAN?

Hell no. Doing puzzles is time I could spend doing something more useful, like scratching my ass.

It'd be too easy, anyway.

SO YOU CLAIM! HOWEVER! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AM NO AMATEUR PUZZLE CONSTRUCTOR!

Uh-huh. Sure. What are they, jigsaw puzzles? Real brain-breakers.

NYEH-HEH-HEH! OH, YOU'LL SEE!

Aw, shit. Are you gonna send me a damn Junior Jumble now?

HAH! THAT'S FOR BABY BONES! I'LL SEND YOU A FANTASTIC PUZZLE!

Is there any way to stop you?

THE GREAT PAPYRUS CAN NEVER BE STOPPED ONCE HE STARTS A CAMPAIGN!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Video/Action for Violet City

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